Don't get me wrong, I love winning. The goal of winning is why we do what we do. But I've always had one eye on the prize and one eye on becoming a better driver and improving myself in whatever way necessary. So I don't see losing as such a bad thing. If I won my first ever race, what would I have learnt? The challenge teaches you about your weaknesses and gives you an opportunity to be better next time, with the ultimate goal to be the best. The same attitude is why I've never stayed long enough to dominate any one series; I would rather take a step up before I lose the challenge. Despite this approach costing me more quotable success, I have faith it will pay off in the long run. You can't let yourself stand still if you want to progress.
I had a kart race last week which, despite fighting for the lead and having pace to win, was one of my worst drives for a long time. I made stupid mistakes and eventually threw it off, taking out another competitor in the process and getting my first ever pit-stop penalty in that series. I finished 15th and 1 lap down, my last race this side of the equator. I was gutted afterwards... and coming up to a week later I still haven't watched my footage back. Partly because I know the main reason for my mistakes isn't something I'll see on there, partly because it's still too raw, but I will because it's an opportunity to grow and improve. It would have been nice to sign off in England with a win, but instead it highlighted a weakness in me which I can fix over winter, and I can't be upset with that.
I lost. But I will be a better driver next year because of it.
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I'm busy working on my blog posts. Watch this space!